The Culture Mom» Mother’s Day

Didn’t I Tell You to Listen to Your Mother?

CultureMom — Sun, 18 Nov 2012 21:50:03 +0000

It’s hard to believe that just about a year ago, Listen to Your Mother entered my life. It was so life changing and magnetic that I wrote about it again and again and again and again and again.

In one post, I wrote:

I enjoyed every waking minute of it and nourished the experience. Words can not even express how grateful I was to be a part of it. I kept thinking that the chance of ever working on a NYC stage production again in my lifetime was slim, so I’d better make the most of it. And I did.

I also wrote:

So, would I do it again? If given the chance, yes. But if that doesn’t happen, I have this. All this. And so much more.

And guess what? I am doing it again. LTYM is returning to NYC! And 23 other cities, if you can believe that piece of wonderful news. Watch the video to find out more about the chosen cities.

I get to work with the same incredibly inspiring crew, Director Amy Wilson and Producer Varda Steinhardt. And this year we will be joined by friend and superhero Shari Cabelin Simpson.

This year we’ll be performing the show on Mothers Day on May 12th, 2013, so you can go ahead and save the date! I’m thrilled to be listed as a crew member behind this show and I’m thrilled to be joining some of my favorite women in towns across the country, all giving Mother’s Day a Microphone in their communities this spring. Check out the list here. This experience led to new skills, new friends, new opportunities and a lifetime full of fabulous memories.

Let’s do it again!

A Mother’s Day Poem

CultureMom — Mon, 14 May 2012 01:51:41 +0000

Mom,

You are as sweet as sugar

and as nice as a flower.

You’re as pretty as a lily.

You’re like a star in the middle of the night.

But I’m just glad you are my mom.

Love,

Olivia

Happy Anti-Mother’s Day from Time Magazine

CultureMom — Fri, 11 May 2012 15:15:06 +0000

By now, you’ve all read the blazing controversy surrounding the latest Time Magazine cover. To be honest, I am not even interested in featuring the cover here on my site. I don’t want to feed into the whole sensationalism aspect of what Time has done, driving thousands, if not millions, to the store to pick up a copy to see the image of a 4 year-old standing on a chair while breastfeeding. The story inside the publication that the picture is referring to is about pediatrician Dr. William Sears and attachment parenting. But the headline reads: “Are you mom enough?”

I’ve been reading all the comments on Facebook, Twitter and all over the social media world. The headline is stirring up issues of breastfeeding, parental rights, child advocacy and media sensationalism, to name a few. I would definitely say that the magazine has achieved its goals of reaching the ultimate amount of publicity and dollars in a single day.

When I first saw the cover, I didn’t know what to think. I’m a huge breastfeeding proponent, so that’s not what my shock was about. I admit that I stopped breastfeeding both my kids at 12 months and would never go far as the blogger featured in the photo, Los Angeles-based stay-at-home mother Jamie Lynne Grumet, 26. Apparently, her own mom breastfed her until she was 6.

Well, you know what, that’s her prerogative, I have nothing wrong with that. To each her own. Breastfeeding a child that late is not for me, but for millions of other moms, and breastfeeding is a choice, like all the others one I have in life. I have vivid memories of my friends and family members who were not able to breastfeed their babies and how agonizing it was for them, and it’s not certainly not fair to pass judgement on any of us for bottle feeding our children. Like I said, breastfeeding was for me, but I never once told any other mother that is was the only choice and no mother should be made to feel guilty about how they fed their child ever.

What also bothers me is why Time Magazine has chosen to put this image and headline that don’t go together on their cover the weekend of Mother’s Day when it has little to do with the article referred on the cover. To drive sales, perhaps? Well, that’s obvious.

But it hurts. Doesn’t the world understand already that being a mother is one of the most life-changing experiences of our lives? Motherhood is the best kind of responsibility but with it comes choices. Everyday there are decisions to make about what my children are eating, who is taking care of them while I’m at work, who they’re spending time with, how to find time for their homework and activities, keeping them safe and so much mre. And these are no one’s decisions but my own (made jointly with my husband). Mothers have to make decisions and they aren’t easy ones, and it’s not fair for anyone to judge us.

And that’s this magazine cover does. It pits moms against each other. It makes us look at each other and compare ourselves, wondering are we really good enough? And that’s not fair.

Being a mom is the best job in the world, so let us go do our work.

Attention NYC Writers and Performers: AUDITIONS

CultureMom — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 17:24:57 +0000

As you know, I am involved with bringing a wonderful show to NYC called LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER. The show is by women, for women, about women, and I have proudly blogged about it here.

Seeking New York City-area writers and/or performers to read their original essays on any aspect of motherhood in the NYC premiere of LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER, to be held at the Goldman-Sonnenfeldt Family Auditorium at the JCC in Manhattan on Sunday, May 6th, 2012.

People of all ages, types, backgrounds, and experience levels are invited to audition. No previous stage experience is necessary. Non-moms WELCOME (men too!). We encourage diverse perspectives on the subject of mothers or mothering.

Auditions will be held on the following dates by appointment only:

Sunday, February 26^th 11am – 2pm

Monday, February 27^th 6pm – 9pm

Tuesday, February 28^th 10am – 1pm

To schedule an audition, email listentoyourmothernyc@gmail.com. Please include your name and your availability during the time slots listed above. Auditions are being held at a midtown Manhattan (West side) studio. Exact location and other details will be sent with your confirmed appointment time.

We are looking for humorous, poignant, painful, joyful or soulful original pieces on mothers and mothering which take three to five minutes to read aloud (please check this before the audition). Previously published work accepted as long as the author retains full rights or has express permission to read the work for this event.

Commitment for cast members includes two rehearsals, a pre-performance run-through at the JCC, and the 2 p.m. performance on May 6^th, 2012.

LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER is a national series of live readings by local writers in celebration of Mother’s Day. This year will be the third for Listen To Your Mother nationwide, and the first for New York City.

The NYC premiere is being directed and produced by mothers and theater professionals Amy Wilson (@amywlsn), Varda Steinhardt (@squashedmom), Holly Rosen Fink (@theculturemom), and Julie Nemitz (@stage_mama).

For more information, please visit listentoyourmothershow.com/nyc. Feel free to email any questions to listentoyourmotherNYC@gmail.com. We can’t wait to meet you!

Listen to Your Mother Coming to a Town Near You

CultureMom — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 05:51:51 +0000

About a year ago, I was surfing the internet and came across a show called Listen to Your Mother. I was immediately intrigued. As a social media marketer who lives and breathes NYC theater, I wanted to be a part of it. Here was a show that merged two worlds I care most about. Created by humorist Ann Imig of Ann’s Rants, the show was a “live reading by local writers on the beauty, the beast, and the barely-rested of motherhood.” It was amazing, and I was intrigued. I made sure that before BlogHer ended, where I finally came face to face with the show, I introduced to myself to Ann. Sometimes you know you have to meet someone, and she was that someone.

And boy, am I sure that I did. That meeting led to an incredible opportunity that I can finally share with you. I am going to be involved with the 2012 national tour of the show!

To give you more background, Listen To Your Mother began with one show of local writers reading in Madison on Mother’s Day 2010. Bloggers across the country began asking to host LTYM in their home towns, and in 2011 they went national with shows in Austin, Los Angeles, Madison, NW Indiana, and Spokane.

The show is by women, for women, about women. The show’s mission is about supporting women in more ways than one. I’ll be sharing more news about that in the days to come and if you are a local writer, start writing as we’ll be holding auditions early next year!

For 2012, in keeping with the goal to give LTYM to as many communities as possible, they’re doubling the number of shows to TEN!! The big news for me is that I’m a part of the NYC crew. I’m joining a cast of incredible women as Associate Producer (my first producing title ever) to bring the show to our town on May 6th. It is an honor and privilege and I honestly could not be more excited.

Here is the 10 city line-up that was announced today – you should follow all of these amazing women’s blogs, on Twitter and elsewhere.

AUSTIN: Co-Director/Producers Wendi Aarons and Jennifer Sutton

CHICAGO: Co-Director/Producers Tracey Becker and Melisa Wells

D.C.: Director Stephanie Dulli, Producer Kate Coveny Hood

MADISON: National Director, Ann Imig

NYC: Director Amy Wilson, Producer Varda Steinhardt, Assoc. Producers Holly Fink and Julie Nemitz

NW ARKANSAS: Director/Producer Lela Davidson

NW INDIANA: Director/Producer Stephanie Precourt

PHILADELPHIA: Co-Director/Producers Cecily Kellogg and Dresden Shumaker

SAN FRANCISCO: Co-Director/Producers Kim Thompson-Steel and Kirsten Patel

SPOKANE: Director Stacey Conner, Producer Elise Raimi

Mark your calendars. See you at the theater to celebrate Mother’s Day next year!

A Mother’s Day Post: They Had Me at “Hello”

CultureMom — Mon, 09 May 2011 02:04:14 +0000

I’ll never forget the moment my daughter was born. We had been convinced she was a boy all throughout the pregnancy. All the old wives’ tales pointed in the direction of a boy: the way my belly was shaped, my sour food cravings and the key test. A stranger in Manhattan even stopped me in my tracks on the way home from work one day, yelling, “It’s a boy!”

We were so convinced it was a girl that we only picked out boy’s names. It wasn’t until the day before I was induced, while sitting in the doctor’s waiting room, that I realized there was every chance it could be otherwise and got to work on girl’s names.

Of course, I went around telling everyone that I didn’t care what sex the baby would be, as long as it was healthy, and I meant it. But after seven hours of labor, and an incorrect determination by the doctor at first that she was a boy, when the doctor lifted the umbilical cord and realized “he” was a “she,” I was somewhat elated.

Whether it was the joy of being finished with labor, or the shock at having a girl after being convinced otherwise, I am not sure. Nonetheless, I burst into tears right there and then. She was taken away for a few moments as she had trouble catching her breath at first, so my initial relief turned into concern. The doctor assured she would be fine and asked what we were going to call her and I knew instantly, saying her name right out loud with no hesitation.

When she came back, and I took my first look at her, I could not believe my eyes. She literally had me at “Hello.” The fact that this little creature had been resting inside my womb for nine long months amazed me.

The bond occurred immediately. She weighed nearly nine pounds. She latched on to my breasts right away. She slept in my room the entire time I was at the hospital, and I didn’t want her to leave. My mother came to stay with me for a few weeks after she was born. It was all very comical, as my husband and I struggled to quickly learn and adapt to being new parents. He had actually paid closer attention than I on how the nurses in the hospital had cared for her, and it was he who taught me how to change a diaper, swaddle and give her a bath. Whenever we needed to know how to do something that whole first year, we consulted our bible, What to Expect When You’re Expecting.

My husband was instantly charmed by her, as well. After all, she had his blue eyes, his skin color. He took a week off, too, so I could rest, and he wanted to be home with us. We had no idea how days would turn into nights quicker than ever before. Taking care of a newborn is 24/7. Having help was essential in our early days as early parents, and I was also glad to have the company. My mom helped me wash clothes, prepare food, grocery shop, get us to our doctor appointments on time and she helped out with nightly wake-ups. Our very first Passover Seder in our house was a few days after our daughter’s arrival, and we somehow managed to prepare food and read from the Hagaddah. It was a miracle, we were so busy and so tired. But it was nice being together.

Nonetheless, when my mom left and my husband resumed his time at work, I remember feeling a sense of relief. I wanted to do everything myself. I wanted to be alone with her. I was totally into breastfeeding and wanted to get on a schedule. We went into the city to do Mommy and Me yoga once a week. We joined a playgroup. It was summertime and we took long walks together and went to the beach. We also went on a family trip to Montreal that summer.

Alas, when it’s your first child, you really don’t know what to expect. I knew my life was going to change the moment I got pregnant, but I had no idea just how much. I went back to work a few months later and hired a full time babysitter. I was filled with confusion about leaving the baby and was faced with a difficult decision. I loved my job. Without it, I wasn’t sure if I would get the same fulfillment, but I also wanted to be with her. Ultimately, I chose her, and life has never been the same.

When I got pregnant with my second child shortly after I left my job, I was not as excited as I had been the first time. I was still confused about my changed identity. I had difficulties being at home at first, and I loved being with my daughter, but having another baby would be hard work.

My husband and I agreed not find out the sex once again, as it had been such fun not knowing the first time. The joy and shock of finding out at birth was a treat, and the guessing part had been a hoot. However, my husband couldn’t come to the ultra sound that crucial day when I was told I could find out if I wanted to. I mentioned to the technician that I didn’t want to know, but that she could point out anything interesting if anything appeared interesting. Of course, within seconds, something that appeared quite phallic flashed on the screen, and she mentioned having a few sons herself. And I knew. I knew I was having a boy.

I told my husband that night. I apologized to him for ruining the surprise, but I told him that somehow I felt the joy that I needed to feel about having another child. I was excited about having a boy. It would be a different experience and we would have one of each. Two sounded like a good number for me.

The night before he was born, I spent some time with my daughter. I felt sorry for her that at such a young age, another child was going to vie for my attention. When I brought her into the delivery room after he was born, she burst into tears at the sight of another baby in my arms.

He didn’t have me at “Hello.” I was overwhelmed in the beginning as I had two babies to look after, and it was often hard having two crying children, not knowing who to tend to first.

He latched on right away, and our bond started to form from the beginning. When he was about 6-8 weeks old, I remember holding him after a feeding, and he looked at me with his dark brown eyes, much like mine, and smiled that baby smile you aren’t sure is gas or happiness.

And he had me. It was our “Hello” our moment. A moment I will never forget.

Disclosure: This post was originally posted on NYC Moms.

Spend Mother’s Day at the Theater with Wonderland

CultureMom — Sat, 07 May 2011 02:08:16 +0000

WONDERLAND is the soaring new musical that takes a new kind of Alice into a world of kaleidoscopic fantasy and romantic adventure. As a mom whose life is spinning out of control, Alice’s yearning for happier times leads her on a quest far below the streets of New York City, to the other side of the looking glass. There, she meets a marvelous cast of familiar but phenomenally re-imagined characters who help her navigate this impossibly peculiar universe, and change her life forever. This Mother’s Day WONDERLAND is offering a special buy-one-get-one-free offer! Buy your mom a ticket and you go for free to the 3pm performance on Mother’s Day, May 8th! Go here and use code WLMOM.

The New York Times calls WONDERLAND “Peppily inspirational.” “A hummable, cheerful Broadway fairy tale” wrote Bloomberg News. UPI calls it “A knockout in every way.” And, the Tampa Tribune wrote “WONDERLAND is fun and entertaining.”

The principal cast includes Janet Dacal (Alice), Darren Ritchie (White Knight), E. Clayton Cornelious (Caterpillar), Jose Llana (El Gato), Karen Mason (Queen of Hearts), Kate Shindle (Mad Hatter), Carly Rose Sonenclar (Chloe) and Edward Staudenmayer (White Rabbit), and Danny Stiles (Morris).

Original Broadway Cast Recording available on Masterworks Broadway www.MasterworksBroadway.com.

So, if you are looking for an original way to spend Mother’s Day in New York City, this is it!

Disclosure: I was not compensated to write this post.

Guest Post: Losing My Mom, Finding Myself

Mon, 02 May 2011 23:12:00 +0000

Christina with Kia and Lee, her parents, Los Angeles 1964

My mom died when I was 19. She fought a 10-year battle with breast cancer, refusing treatment, dying at home. The details are too awful to describe.

These are the things she never knew about me:

• I graduated from UC Berkeley
• I have a Master’s Degree from UCLA
• I have two amazing kids
• I married a wonderful guy
• I miss her every day. Every single day.

There was a lot she did know about me:

• I loved her and still do. Always will.
• I didn’t want her to die. I begged her not to die
• I’d make it without her. Somehow.
• I’d never forget her

I’m crying as I write this. My mom was my most important influence, my mentor and my biggest supporter.

After she died, my soul was broken. With determination and an aching heart, I kept going, one foot in front of the other, with the support of my dad and sister.

Today, I’m a mom whose greatest fear is that something will happen to me and I won’t be there for my kids. This is the legacy of losing my mom as a teenager. It’s not an abstract notion. It’s the reality I live with daily.

I honor my mom’s memory is ways that surprise me. I grew up in Topanga, CA, a stunning, rustic canyon outside of Los Angeles. A few days ago, my family moved to Coldwater Canyon, the hills above Los Angeles. I want to give my kids everything my mom gave me.

The most profound and moving example of a mother’s love I’ve ever heard is represented by a 2010 interview on National Public Radio, where Lonnie G. Bunch, director of the Smithsonian’s project to collect artifacts for the National Museum of African American Art And Culture, discusses unique items the public donates to the museum.

“Somebody brought a pillowcase that was embroidered. And it turned out to be a pillowcase that was embroidered by a woman who was enslaved, who was about to be sold the next day. So, she embroidered to her daughter saying, in this pillowcase you will find a dress, you will find some biscuits but what you’ll find is that it’s filled with my love. And though I may never see you again, always know how close you are to my heart.”

My mom, a strong African American woman, didn’t leave me with a real pillowcase filled with treasures. Instead, she left me with a metaphorical one filled with the life skills, the determination and the fortitude to make it in this world without her.

Christina Simon is the co-author of “Beyond The Brochure: An Insider’s Guide To Private Elementary Schools In Los Angeles.” She also writes the blog, www.beyondthebrochure.blogspot.com about applying to private elementary schools in Los Angeles and the ups and downs as life as a private school mom. Christina’s blog was just voted “Top 25 Parent Resources” by Circle Of Moms. She has written recent guest blog pieces for The Culture Mom, BlogHer Syndication, Mamapedia, The Mother Company, The Well Mom, Sane Moms, Eco Mom, Macaroni Kids, A Child Grows In Brooklyn, Power Of Moms, The Twin Coach and Diaries Of A Mixed (Up) Kid. Christina is a former vice president at Fleishman-Hillard, a global public relations firm. She has a 7-year-old son and a 10-year-old daughter. Christina lives in Los Angeles with her husband and kids.