I’ve been reading a lot of articles lately about men who are choosing to stay home while their wives to out to work full-time. Census numbers show more dads are staying home. One-third of dads with working wives regularly care for their kids younger than 15 years old, according to the United States Census Bureau. I just watched this video on the subject. Take a look.
So, why is it that whenever I see or read about a stay-at-home dad like the one in the video, they look like they can are really into it and can cope with the day to day business of taking care of the kids? I have to say, I really don’t get it. I think it must take a very special kind of dad to be able to do it. I mean, my husband actually started changing my kid’s diapers before I did. He even learned to swaddle them before I did, but when it comes to the mundane daily activities, they’ve actually fallen into my lap over the years, and are probably better off that way.
As much as my husband may express interest in being home with the kids, he will always have to work. That’s the plain, sad truth.
But to be honest, I’m not sure how he could ever be home full-time with my kids. Why? Let me give you a few simple reasons:
MEALS: He can’t make lunch. He honestly has no idea what goes into a lunchbox and they would both probably either starve or get served food they never eat. When he does cook, the kitchen becomes a hot mess, and the house would never recover. I’d be coming home to a ship wreck every day, which wouldn’t bode well for our marriage.
CLOTHES: When I’m not around, their clothes don’t match (I am guilty of still taking their clothes out, what can I say, I have lazy kids), and he lets them leave the house without gloves and a hat in freezing cold weather.
HOUSEWORK: Don’t even get me started. I have a cleaner every Monday to clean up, and it’s really just because my husband has been home all weekend. I love him, but the laundry and dishes alone would KILL him.
AFTER SCHOOL ACTIVITIES: As a working mom, I probably have my kids enrolled in too many activities. It definitely makes my life harder but I manage to keep on top of all the times and days. I think the scheduling would make my husband NUTS!
SCHOOL DROP OFF and PICK UP: It’s hard enough for me to get them to school on time, but my husband can’t even leave the house until 11am on the weekends. School starts at 8:40! I’m not sure how that work. As for pick up, when I work from home, time flies. You blink, it’s time to go back. I’m not sure how that would jive with my husband.
PLAY DATES: The whole concept of setting up play dates is bad enough for me, it would surely kill him. The organization that goes into it and the effort in hosting kids at the house is painful, even for me.
HOMEWORK: Generally, when I’m not around at night, homework never gets done. They’d have an “Incomplete” every other day. He forgets about it, no one reminds him.
SICK DAYS: Moms never get sick days, and it ain’t fun taking care of a child with a sinus infection where all you want to do is sleep. This one would be tough for my sweet husband, who rarely gets sick. When he does, he gets REALLY sick.
BEDTIME: After being home with the kids all day, my goal is to get the kids to bed on time. There’s no messing around. My husband would be running to the bar for a pint of beer as soon as I walked in from a long day at work, if he hadn’t already started drinking beforehand. Joke! (sort of)
MOMMY WARS: Trust me, my husband doesn’t get mommy politics, and I have no desire to get him involved. I’m sure you know what I mean. From the competitive moms in the PTA to the moms who answer the door looking like June Cleaver, I just can’t keep up.
I do have to end this by saying that my husband is an AMAZING father, and I wouldn’t trade him for the world. I may get in trouble for writing this, so I’m throwing that line in, but I really do mean it.
Have anything to add? I’m sure you do. Tell me what you’d add in the comments below.
Holly let’s face it our menfolk are only human after all- luckily we women are superhuman!
My kids have been starting and ending school at the same time for years… and my husband STILL asks me what time they start/end school. No way would staying at home work for him.
I used to feel this exact same way. How could he possibly manage? He does though. My husband has been staying home with both our girls now for about five years. I have to admit, he does it well … better than I probably could. As a matter of fact, if I happen to be home on a school day he makes me stay in bed because I get in the way and mess up his routine.